that's right... the one that wasn't printed in the lec link!

25 pieces of wisdom i have acquired throughout my life

1. when life hands you lemons, it's probably trying to tell you something.
2. an apple a day is a pain if you have braces.
3. the answers to all of life's problems can be found in 2, 7, 12, 42, and pi. you just have to pick the right one on the first try.
4. despite what the masses say, there is no application in real life for geometry.
5. the above also applies for fear factor and guidance counselors.
6. practice never makes perfect. if it did, then what was the point of practicing?
7. cranium clay smells good.
8. never put the aforementioned clay on your ceiling.
9. life is like a bowl of cherries. too many darn pits.
10. just because no one understands you does not make you an artist.
11. come to think of it, football has no practical application either.
12. if at first you don't succeed, try a lemon. they have plenty.
13. our youth are our future, so duck and cover.
14. nobody's perfect. that's why i make these lists.
15. the grass is always greener somewhere else. (no one said there had to be a fence nearby.)
16. when in rome, get a souvenir.
17. if you can't beat 'em, you're probably losing.
18. when all else fails, run.
19. if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.
20. read a book. it's good for you.
21. the color green. (just reflect on this for a moment.)
22. nothing good ever comes from maryland.
23. just call the whole thing off. seriously, no one cares whether you say "po-tay-to" or "puh-ta-to".
24. origami is not a martial art.
25. finally, friends will come and go, kingdoms will rise and fall, but the game of "wanna buy a duck" will last forever.

(edit: this was finally printed... it just wasn't printed right away. if i had known that i submitted this after the deadline...)  ¶ 5:34 PM